Greetings my Simian Brothers and Sisters, May the spirit of The Lawgiver be with you.
Today’s sermon is on a subject most disturbing. It concerns that ungodly and dangerous animal known as Man. Our first Article of Faith tells us that the Almighty created the Ape in his own image; that he gave him a soul and a mind; that he set him apart from all the beasts of the jungle, and made him lord of the planet. These sacred truths are self-evident.
But it is alarming these days that certain young and cynical scientists have chosen to study Man, believing that Man can be domesticated. To suggest that we can learn anything about the Simian nature from a study of Man is sheer nonsense. Man has no understanding, he can be taught a few simple tricks, nothing more. The proper study of Apes is Apes.
My dear old friend, Minister of Science and Chief Defender of the Faith, the good Dr. Zaius once put it this way: Man is a nuisance. He eats up his food supply in the forest, then migrates to our green belts and ravages our crops. The sooner he is exterminated the better; it’s a question of simian survival.
Yet consider the Sacred Scrolls of our great Lawgiver, the Thirteenth Scroll, which says: "And Proteus brought the upright beast into the garden and chained him to a tree and the children did make sport of him." This shows us that the ancients once kept humans as household pets. That is, until the Lawgiver proved that Man could not be tamed.
Let me conclude with the words of the greatest Ape of all, our Lawgiver, in the 29th Scroll, sixth verse: “Beware the beast Man, for he is the Devil's pawn. Alone among God's primates, he kills for sport or lust or greed. Yea, he will murder his brother to possess his brother's land. Let him not breed in great numbers, for he will make a desert of his home and yours. Shun him; drive him back into his jungle lair, for he is the harbinger of death.”
Till our next sermon, may the blessings of the Lawgiver be upon you all. Amen.
Sermon Beneath the Planet of Apes
Last Sermon on the Planet of the Apes
Sermon Beneath the Planet of the Apes 2
Epilogue of the Planet of the Apes