(Previous Cyberspace Artifacts HERE)
Thank-you for your application. Your qualifications were competitive and your letters of recommendation were enthusiastically supportive. As you may be aware the number of openings is limited and subject to budgetary approval each year. Unfortunately, this year we have had a high number of unusually qualified applicants and therefore we are unable to offer you a position. The admissions committee understands your disappointment and wishes you all the best in your future endeavours.
The editors at Table and Chairs Magazine were surprised by your short story submission. As a professional courtesy we recommend that you research the direction and content of prospective publications by reading some back-issues and editorial pages. Your carelessness is an insult to the publisher and a wasted effort. Your work may show promise but is beyond our interest and ability to assess.
.....we believe that you exhibit dynamic skills but are not the best team fit and, here at Colombian Travel Inc, teamwork is everything. Good luck in your job search.
Thank-you for your interest in the Guilford Hotel Dining Service. We’ve considered your attributes and noted some areas for improvement but have decided to work with another candidate. Your application will be kept on file for the next 6 months and, should a position open that is more aligned with your experience and qualifications, we will notify you. Sincerely,
....Our team of certified financial advisors has assessed your application and we regret to inform you that you do not qualify for a personal loan. Your financial and employment history is too variable to warrant any serious consideration. We apologize for the inconvenience and wish you luck going forward.
..... Davis exhibits strength of character, ambition, and a precocious intelligence. Unfortunately, he did not respond well to our female staff and at one point asked if there were any men working here. This is unacceptable; especially in a 4 yr old. At New World Daycare we choose candidates and families that best exemplify our mission statement and values. His attitude is not conducive to the mutually supportive environment we work so diligently to maintain. We believe Davis would be more suited to a publically funded service.
.... your father is in reasonably good health and his medical record indicates he falls within manageable parameters. However, we believe his idiosyncrasies, though minor, would be a cause of some concern for both our staff and residents. We recommend that you consider a facility where more supervised care and sympathetic ears could be found. Our sister residence in Guilford would be more appropriate to the kind of supervision we believe your father requires. However, we are unable to forward your application as they work with different admissions criteria. You are welcome to contact them directly.
....I have left you. I can no longer live with someone who so often encounters disappointment. You attract rejection. That is your success. You have no forward momentum. Let this note serve as another item in your litany of “almosts”. My portion of the bills is paid to month-end and I have notified the caretakers of my intent to vacate. You can work out the details with them. Susan and JP will come for my furniture and winter clothing next Saturday. Be nice to them. I have changed my email and phone number and leave for Europe tonight. Any attempt to contact me will be considered harassment. Sorry and good-bye.
(Recently Uncovered Cyberspace Artifacts HERE)
Herr Doktor
Thank-you for your application. Your qualifications were competitive and your letters of recommendation were enthusiastically supportive. As you may be aware the number of openings is limited and subject to budgetary approval each year. Unfortunately, this year we have had a high number of unusually qualified applicants and therefore we are unable to offer you a position. The admissions committee understands your disappointment and wishes you all the best in your future endeavours.
The editors at Table and Chairs Magazine were surprised by your short story submission. As a professional courtesy we recommend that you research the direction and content of prospective publications by reading some back-issues and editorial pages. Your carelessness is an insult to the publisher and a wasted effort. Your work may show promise but is beyond our interest and ability to assess.
.....we believe that you exhibit dynamic skills but are not the best team fit and, here at Colombian Travel Inc, teamwork is everything. Good luck in your job search.
Thank-you for your interest in the Guilford Hotel Dining Service. We’ve considered your attributes and noted some areas for improvement but have decided to work with another candidate. Your application will be kept on file for the next 6 months and, should a position open that is more aligned with your experience and qualifications, we will notify you. Sincerely,
....Our team of certified financial advisors has assessed your application and we regret to inform you that you do not qualify for a personal loan. Your financial and employment history is too variable to warrant any serious consideration. We apologize for the inconvenience and wish you luck going forward.
..... Davis exhibits strength of character, ambition, and a precocious intelligence. Unfortunately, he did not respond well to our female staff and at one point asked if there were any men working here. This is unacceptable; especially in a 4 yr old. At New World Daycare we choose candidates and families that best exemplify our mission statement and values. His attitude is not conducive to the mutually supportive environment we work so diligently to maintain. We believe Davis would be more suited to a publically funded service.
.... your father is in reasonably good health and his medical record indicates he falls within manageable parameters. However, we believe his idiosyncrasies, though minor, would be a cause of some concern for both our staff and residents. We recommend that you consider a facility where more supervised care and sympathetic ears could be found. Our sister residence in Guilford would be more appropriate to the kind of supervision we believe your father requires. However, we are unable to forward your application as they work with different admissions criteria. You are welcome to contact them directly.
....I have left you. I can no longer live with someone who so often encounters disappointment. You attract rejection. That is your success. You have no forward momentum. Let this note serve as another item in your litany of “almosts”. My portion of the bills is paid to month-end and I have notified the caretakers of my intent to vacate. You can work out the details with them. Susan and JP will come for my furniture and winter clothing next Saturday. Be nice to them. I have changed my email and phone number and leave for Europe tonight. Any attempt to contact me will be considered harassment. Sorry and good-bye.
(Recently Uncovered Cyberspace Artifacts HERE)
Herr Doktor