Mixing New Age products and techniques is the right of every spiritual consumer. What’s wrong with a buffet? Cheesecake with your roast beef, sir?
Pilates out. Yoga In.
Rocks and crystals arranged in certain orders create energy which can influence events and outcomes. This energy cannot be measured or observed in any way.
Precious stones are valued because of their inherent “powers” not their geological features or geo-chemical properties. “Oh, look, a purple crystal pendant! Carol could really do with that.”
Incense and aromatics heal. They can purify. Smudging cleanses. To stink of essential oils or cedar is to be sacred.
Incense can influence moods. It can also cause lung cancer.
Patchouli is the scent of an angry lesbian.
Yoga shall be practiced by college-aged women who ride 40+ year old bicycles and transport their mats in a manner meant to be seen and immediately understood. They are pure and they are good. We are humbled.
Environmental damage is a consequence of “man’s” oppression of women. Women inherently understand connection to the earth; men do not.
That lump in your armpit can be cured on the soles of your feet.
Memories are buried in your physicality. Sore neck? That’s because of a fight you had with your Mom when you were six, not because your pillow needs replacing.
Palmistry and tarot cards are legitimate forms of inquiry. Logic and observable, testable hypotheses belong to doubters like James Randi.
Tai chi in the mountains will cure your inner turmoil. Professional psychotherapy is part of the problem, not the solution. Don’t get me started on the use of psychotropic medications....
Astrology is closely related to astronomy. Cosmos is important for that reason as it will validate astrology.
Homeopathy heals because, well, it does.
Beads, batik, baubles are the three “B’s” of New Age decorative aesthetics.
Pewter. Enough said.
If it’s from Indonesia, it must be good.
Eastern mysticism and Sufi poetry are more insightful than the West’s thousands of years of intellectual and “spiritual” history. West bad. East good.
Burning candles is a sacred right. It is also a fire hazard.
Herr Doktor